I wouldn't want you to think I am obsessed with diet,
even if I am. However weighing myself with glasses off
has now become impossible.

Weight

i went to my optometrist last week
and told him plain and straight
i need glasses that are lighter
he peered at the marks on my nose
and the hardness behind my ears
and asked, "Do you wear them at night or
what exactly is the problem?"
"Well," I replied, "it happens like this,
I weigh myself now and again.
With glasses off I've lost five pounds
but with them on I've put on ten.